The skill to get hot without getting mad — to have a good argument that doesn’t become personal — is critical in life. But it’s one that few parents teach to their children. We want to give kids a stable home, so we stop siblings from quarreling and we have our own arguments behind closed doors. Yet if kids never get exposed to disagreement, we’ll end up limiting their creativity.
If we rarely see a spat, we learn to shy away from the threat of conflict. Witnessing arguments — and participating in them — helps us grow a thicker skin. We develop the will to fight uphill battles and the skill to win those battles, and the resilience to lose a battle today without losing our resolve tomorrow.
It’s a sign of respect to care enough about someone’s opinion that you’re willing to challenge it.
We can also help by having disagreements openly in front of our kids. Most parents hide their conflicts: They want to present a united front, and they don’t want kids to worry. But when parents disagree with each other, kids learn to think for themselves. They discover that no authority has a monopoly on truth. They become more tolerant of ambiguity. Rather than conforming to others’ opinions, they come to rely on their own independent judgment.
…teaching kids how to have healthy disagreements. We can start with four rules:
• Frame it as a debate, rather than a conflict.
• Argue as if you’re right but listen as if you’re wrong.
• Make the most respectful interpretation of the other person’s perspective.
• Acknowledge where you agree with your critics and what you’ve learned from them.
Our chances of keeping global warming below the 2C danger threshold are very, very small: only about 5%. The reason, according to the paper’s authors, is that the cuts we’re making to greenhouse gas emissions are being cancelled out by economic growth.
This is what ecologists call “de-growth”. This calls for redistributing existing resources and investing in social goods in order to render growth unnecessary.
After all, once we have excellent healthcare, education, and affordable housing, what will endlessly more income growth gain us? Maybe bigger TVs, flashier cars, and expensive holidays. But not more happiness, or stronger communities, or more time with our families and friends. Not more peace or more stability, fresher air or cleaner rivers. Past a certain point, GDP gains us nothing when it comes to what really matters. In an age of climate change, where the pursuit of ever more GDP is actively dangerous, we need a different approach.
Your team may not have the best hitters on the court but that doesn’t mean they can’t win.
“Our team recently had the pleasure of being schooled in the art of shot-making when we ran into a shorter team that was struggling in warm-up to bang the ball but obviously had good players and experience. We started strong with a couple of our own bombs but quickly found ourselves in a deficit on the scoreboard with balls flying off our big blockers, rolling into the corners of the court and slithering down the backside of the front line. It was a thing of beauty – for the other team.”
Kristen has chosen not to play Club Volleyball next season. Though the primary reason is she got hooked on Sand Volleyball this past summer, it doesn’t hurt that she won’t be subjected to the long repetitive indoor season. She wants to continue to play basketball for her High School this year and next. Sand will afford her a more flexible schedule and perhaps more options in the summer. She skipped the Spring/Summer Select Basketball season this year. Last year, she played on a Club “Lite” program to allow her to play Select Basketball in the Spring.
Here are some excerpts from the article linked above:
More and more college volleyball players are showing up on campus already broken or they break down once they arrive.
But everyone has a responsibility to take care of the players and nobody wants to be the person to give the kids rest, not the high school coaches, the club coaches, the college coaches. The problem is not going to be solved until everyone takes a joint responsibility in giving the players the rest they need. Everyone wants to complain, but everyone’s equally responsible.
I think a lot of people will say playing on cement all the way through is a problem, It is a problem and with kids starting younger and younger, and there are some positives, but there’s also a cumulative effect of playing on bad surfaces all the time.
Athletes train more than ever before and “they’re training the same motor patterns over and over and over. There’s not as much recovery time and there’s not as much general athletic training, just getting away from the sports-specific components. And that’s everywhere.
I think cross training is really important, especially for younger kids, It so good for your body to be doing something different.
We play too much volleyball at the junior level. Only volleyball. What I mean by that is I would rather recruit a kid who is playing some basketball, some softball, track and field, or maybe soccer, because I think we overuse the same muscle groups in that one sport. So if you’re only playing volleyball you’re wearing out the shoulders and the knees. In basketball, you have some different things and you’re running. In soccer you’re doing more cutting moves.
As Select Volleyball tryout season quickly approaches I hear a buzz about players considering trying out with competing clubs. My all means if you feel a different club will prepare your player better go for it. But if you are simply trying to get on a “better” team, or feel your current club doesn’t value your player’s abilities, then you might want to rethink your decision to switch clubs.
“In my daily conversations with college coaches they look for factors that have nothing to do with whether the athlete is on the 1’s team or 2’s team.”
“When you are recruiting a student-athlete, what are your thoughts when they switch clubs to ‘make a higher number team’, in turn does this negatively affect your position in their recruitment?” Of the 75 coaches I surveyed, 55 (73%) responded that it would negatively affect their view of the athlete if she switched clubs just to make a higher number team. They would believe the athlete to be more concerned with recognition over key factors such as training, competitiveness and being prepared to play at the next level. Ironically, almost all of the 55 coaches shared that if the athlete was making the switch based upon higher level training or the opportunity to play another position that would enhance her potential to be recruited, then it would not be considered a detriment to her recruitment.
Before making your decision, find out exactly what your role will be for your team. Too often players choose the 1’s team and end up playing only a fraction of each match or barely see playing time at all. This makes it difficult for a college coach to evaluate a player at a tournament. Coach Jenny McDowell, Head Women’s Volleyball Coach at Emory University believes it is valuable to gain playing time. “For me, it does not matter if a player plays on the 1’s or 2’s team… it just depends on the level of the player. I would much rather have a player play for the 2’s team than sit on the bench for the 1’s team.”
Greg Reitz, Head Women’s and Men’s Volleyball Coach at Lourdes University states “many times the kids on the 2’s team get to play more consistently, for example a 6 rotation right side or outside hitter. That usually doesn’t happen on a 1’s team because you are chosen to play a position, in addition to your teammates the Defensive Specialists that fill the roster.”
Kristen Kleymeyer ’19 Basketball Varsity 2016-2017
How is David doing in his freshman year at A&M? He’s doing great! This video illustrates how good A&M is at making students feel welcome and helping them fit in.
David had his first Lacrosse game vs Texas State Friday night. They won but It would not have mattered to the more than 30 friends that showed up to cheer him on!
These friends are from his Freshman Reaching Excellence in Engineering club (F.R.E.E). Their website describes themselves as: “The organization serves to create events that promote the unity and leadership of all freshman engineers. “. I would have to say, mission accomplished! F.R.E.E. is just one of several freshman leadership organizations under the umbrella of the Freshman Leadership Organization (FLO)
Did David score the winning goal? Did they win the Lonestar Alliance conference championship? No, one of their own was competing and they came to cheer him on! That’s it. What a fine group of young adults!